Wednesday, January 28, 2009

PHX, More Elvis, Top Ten Movie Lists

The Physics test went alright today. Probably a high B or an A is what I am thinking. There were like 2 problems that I was not sure on...and there is always another one that takes you completely by surprise. It was on Waves and Electric Fields. The Wave stuff went down good, but the Electromagnetism stuff was a little over my head. Luckily he stuck to problems with formulas, which I stuck on my handy little note-card. I love the concept of the note-card. I am learning to have microfish-like handwriting. Nothing compared to Brad Grandy's though. You would have thought he typed the whole thing in a fontsize number 3. Ridiculously small!

Tonight I went over to Jodi Burton's house and made the Elvis Sandwich. It was quite tasty even for the second go around. If this is what my cooking skills amount to though, I am in some sad shape. Listened to some Elvis to get some inspiration. It was like his 50 greatest hits through time. We decided that you can actually hear Elvis getting fatter as he grew old. His songs get less energetic and his voice becomes a much richer baritone. Its all about young Elvis in my opinion, I liked it when he was more of a lady-killer. In some of those recordings you can't even hear him because there is so much screaming. How did he do that? The Beatles figured that secret out as well obviously. Check it out.

I thought I would post my top 10 worst adn best movies of the year. Many will disagree with this list. Good thing that it is just an opinion. And yes, there are many movies I have not got around to seeing yet, so if I missed out on one that you think is crucial...don't freak out. Some may find this list a bit childish, but I think those were some of the better movies that came out. I'm sick of too much depressing stuff.
oh and as a disclaimer, I have not seen all the worst on the list.

10. Don't Mess with the Zohan: Please Adam Sandler, Please be in something like Punch Drunk Love again. Stop making these crappy comedies. You are better than this!

9. The Love Guru: Its like Austin Powers 4. Mini-me is even in it. Come on.

8. What happens in Vegas: I actually have seen this show. Ashton Kutcher is such a moron. What makes him think he has comedy chops? And why did Dennis Miller get involved in this one? It is just straight up bad comedy, and adds some chick flick elements to it. Don't be fooled by the pretty faces!!!!

7. Indiana Jones: This really wasn't that bad, but the disappointment involved in it magnified its suckyness. I know that Indiana Jones has always dabbled in the supernatural, but aliens were a poor choice. Just my opinion.

6. Jumper: Hayden Christian Anderson or whatever the crud Anakin's real name is has had enough chances. He is no good in the movies. Sick of it. Fed up. Move on.

5. Disaster Movie/Meet the Spartans: Its all the same thing, so this one is two in one. I am so sick of even having to watch these trailers. It proves that obnoxiousness does pay off if you live in Hollywood.

4. The Hottie and the Nottie: This may be the worst movie of all time as some people have put it. Paris Hilton is not a Hottie. She can keep telling herself that, but she is not all that attractive. At some point she is going to have to find out that she is not an entertainer either.

3. Fools Gold: "Wanna make some money? Lets get that guy who plays the bongos naked and talks out of the side of his mouth and some blonde girl who's mom was famous and put them in a generic plot about treasure and have them fall in love during it. Make sure they are both in bathing suits so we don't have to write anything interesting and they don't have to act it out all that well. That'll work for sure!"

2. Never Back Down: The only thing I hate worse than a mindless chick flick is a mindless guy flick. This is the posterboy for the category. And I think its funny how the film's premise is the high school underground ultimate fighting league. Yeah, my higschool experience was just like that.

1. Twilight. How could I not include this. Edward is not real. He will not sweep you off your feet. Dress it up however you want, but please do not refer to it as "great" literature or film making. When you talk about twilight, you sound like a guy that is obsessed with Magic Cards or Dungeons and Dragons. This is everything cinema should not be.

10. Hellboy 2: I know the story is a bit much and some of the acting is a little cheezy...heck its not even all that well written, but how can you not be entertained watching this? I have never seen anything this visually appealing, and it made me excited for Del Toro to direct the Hobbit.

9. Iron Man: This was just a very well done action movie, and you don't get many of those. I will be the first to admit that I thought the trailers of it looked stupid and I even groaned that Marvel must be running out of Super Heros. But Robert Downey Junior made him the most likeable of the bunch.

8. Kung-Fu Panda: Took my nephew to see it this summer and I think I liked it more that he did. He laughed at the slapstick, I laughed at the awesome Kung-Fu movie Cliques they fit into the show. As a kid I went through a Kung-Fu flim stage for an extended period of time, so I got alot of the jokes. And it was really well written and had a great moral to the whole thing. That movie should be required watching for people trying to write a coherent story.

7. Encounters at the End of the World: Herzog Directs another strangely interesting Documentary. He does not go wrong.

6. Gran Torino: Okay Okay, some of the racist remarks Clint spouts were a bit over the mark even for what he was trying to do, and sure, the kids in it are horrible actors, but man does Clint Eastwood have screen presence. You don't want to look away from him when he is on screen. You still get the feeling that the 80 year old guy could snap your neck if he wanted, and that is a tough thing to portray. I can't give anything away, but it does make a good point about real friendship and motivation to change your bad habits.

5. Man on Wire: This was the best documentary to come out this year. Its about the guy who walked across a tightrope that spanned the world trade centers. It is funny but also just an amazing story. The guy is a little off his rocker, which makes it all the more entertaining.

4. Let the Right One In: This movie is everything that is not Twilight. Its scary, different, and weird. I won't give anything away except that there are vampires and they are not teenagers fighting werewolves and evil Italian secret society vampires.

3. Ghost Town: This to me is the best romantic comedy that I have seen since Groundhogs day. Its funny, and its not purely about the mundane details of a relationship. Its more about learning to actually care for people. Ricky Gervais was great as a leading man, which is surprising.

2 The Dark Knight: Some people will be mad that this is not number one on my list. I liked the movie alot, otherwise it would not be here. But the story was not all that coherent, and the actors all kind of paled in comparison to Heath Ledger's performance. Still amazingly good, and I don't think it could have been much better, just not my favorite this year.

1. Son of Rambow: This was a genuinely clean, funny, family comedy about trying to fit in and also being creative. It brought alot of Nostalgia in the way Be Kind Rewind failed to do. This was the best movie that came out this year, period.

I haven't seen The Wrestler, Happy-Go-Lucky, Slumdog Millionare, Reservation Road, Benjamin Button, Milk, Frost/Nixon, The Changeling, or Synecdoche NY. So those might be contenders, but once again, havent seen 'em.

Top albums of the year for me to come next week sometime.


Anonymous said...

does that mean you did see hottie and the Nottie and even worse twilight?

Calvin Smooth said...

i should have made a disclaimer. I have not seen 80% of the movies on the worst of list. those are knee-jerk assumptions. I have seen Indiana Jones and the What Happens in Vegas one.